Monday, June 15, 2015

Butt Head, Pee Face and Poopy Butt

It seems that whether I am listening to my children playing in the living room, or we are shopping at a store, or they are in the yard with the neighborhood kids, there are definitely words that consistently come out of my children's mouths.

This would be fine if these words were things like, "Thank you ma'am." Or, "I love you sister." Or any other adorable words such as butterflies, rainbows or cotton candy. Occasionally I do hear my kids use similar appropriate language, and once in awhile they even surprise me with their empathic and thoughtful word choices.

But lately it seems that my kids don't make these cute or adorable word choices as often as they should.

At the store the other day, my 3-year-old son said, "Thank you Butt," to a kind, elderly cashier who was complementing him on his haircut. I was humiliated, but not surprised. I hope she had her visible hearing aids turned down enough so that she only caught the first part of his response.

But it isn't just my youngest son, who you might argue is too young to understand what he is really saying.

All three of my kids are obsessed with calling each other baby butts, butt heads, pee faces, and poopy butts, and several other derivatives and combinations of immature references to bodily functions.

I used to think that it was just their attempt to be funny or to rile me up. But the more I hear them saying these things, the more I believe that they are now actually processing their thoughts using these words.

For example, the other night my 7-year-old asked, "Why did God make us?" Innocent enough question right?

But it was immediately followed in the same breath by, "Why does the word pee only have one 'P' in it if it comes out of your peepee?" I mean seriously? Couldn't he have let me have just one small moment of enjoyment in his thoughtful question about our Lord?

My daughter chimes in sometimes too. She tends to try to use phrases like, "I don't love you anymore," or "(insert a brothers name) is not my friend" in order to get her desired effect. I do still catch her saying words like butt, pee and poop but not as often as the boys.

I'm hoping this is a phase that soon passes.

They aren't complete toilet mouths. I am able to get some pride out of the few other precious things they say, like the other day when my youngest said so matter-of-factly, "I can't kiss your lips mommy. That's only for marry. Here's a puppy kiss," and he licked my cheek (Okay in typing it up I realize that this might actually sound gross but it was really cute, I swear).

Another problem I have is that I have started to use these ridiculous words too. I called my husband a poopy head the other day when he made me mad. I called him a poopy head, and you know what? I really meant it!

I'm thinking I definitely need more adult interaction this summer.

I really don't believe that I am alone in this problem. I hear other kids using these words and phrases too. I did recently take all YouTube apps and Google search apps off of my kid's devices and I am hoping this cuts down at least some of the exposure they have to these words.

So if you are around my family and you hear my son say an immature reference to someone being a puke butt, I hope that you aren't too judgmental of my kids. We are working on it.

In the end they are good kids and I am a good parent.

And if you don't think so, then don't be such a pee face.

And then they have their adorable moments like this.